Cunning's Journal

[Cunning]

I'm not so young any more at 49 years of age, but still young enough for this new endeavour. You see, I've never had a wet dream before. Now, I understand I may one of the few unfortunate never destined for one, no matter how long I AB. But it's worth a try.

Actually, the main reason I've giving up MB is to conserve my energies. I feel really spent and tired after each PMO session. I'm even attributing my brain fog to the dopamine depletion and loss of sensitivity. So, with the new year afoot, I thought I'd give myself a head start. My last PMO was 16 November 2012 and my last MO was 30 November. So, as of today, I've been AB for five weeks. The last time I went this long was at the age of 14 or 15, when I got struck by a vehicle whilst riding my bicycle. I thought it was divine punishment for my MB habits. So I stopped, for a total of 8 weeks. Then it became an almost daily habit for me. More recently, I'd MB at least once or twice a week, maybe three or four times, depending on my energy levels.

My first two weeks were the toughest. I won't go through all the emotions, suffice to say most of you have experienced them before. But now ending my 5th week and starting my 6th, I feel perfectly at ease with myself. I really feel I can do this forever. My energy levels have soared, and I'm getting things done. The only time I feel horny is in the morning, but I guess that's only natural.

I'm not willing my very first WD with any real anxiety. If it happens, it'll happen. At the very least, I think I can give it 90 days to materialise, before I give in to regular sex. Otherwise, it's adios amigo MB. It's such a waste of precious time, let alone energy, to fap for hours just for 20 seconds of pleasure. It's good to reclaim some of my life back from such a pointless activity.

[MaxJ]

Hi, Cunning.

Good to hear that you've undertaken complete AB from MB. Unfortunately, it does appear unlikely that you'll achieve a WD, but do not give up hope! As you say, it's worth a try. I'm very surprised that in your eight-week abstinence as a teenager you didn't have one.

Good luck to you!

[Cunning]

Hi Max,

The absence of a WD in my teenage 8-week AB stint is the main reason I'm not holding out great hopes of one in my late forties. But getting a WD is not my primary goal. Having said that, I did experience a couple of slightly erotic dreams a few weeks into my current AB. So maybe there's a glimmer of hope. It's still early days.

Cunning

[Lifestyle]

Thanks for your post Cunning.
I'm 51 and never had a wet dream.
I've attempted to abstain a number of times but have always fallen back into the MB habit. Although I love the feeling during the abstinence. I feel very strong and masculine.
During my last attempt, 6 weeks, I was very content and for most of this time had a mindset that I wasn't abstaining for a period but was living without MB in my life. For some strange reason his ended with a conscious and planned decicsion to MB.
Anyway, I'm now attempting again.... the New Year thing....
I will watch your progess with much interest you are already inspiring me...It's great to see another man of similar age on this forum
Thanks

[Ronald]

Welcome and good luck!

[Cunning]

I will watch your progess with much interest you are already inspiring me...It's great to see another man of similar age on this forum

Hello Lifestyle,

I feel less alone already in this company of young 'uns. My best wishes for your endeavour. I haven't quite made six weeks yet, but I feel quietly confident of my own goal of being MB free.

Today is day 37, and it's been relatively uneventful. I'm starting to get morning wood again, and I remember leaking a bit of prostatic fluid doing number twos a couple of days ago. Other than the occasional stirring of the loins, I've not had any overwhelming urges or feeling especially horny in any way. I've stayed away from porn and kept myself busy with little projects around the house.

[Cunning]

Today marks 40 days I've been MB free.

I've been having strangely vivid dreams, but nothing at all sexual in nature. My morning erections are getting much firmer and longer lasting. But I'm still not tempted to MB.

Whilst I'm feeling genuinely relaxed, being on holiday and all that, I've also been feeling a little less sharp in my mind. It feels almost like a slight return to brain fog. I'm putting it down to a complete de-stress and will see how my mind copes when I return to work next week.

Getting around and about in town, I'm certainly a lot more perceptive to enticing feminine forms. If I wasn't married, I'd feel bold enough to strike up a conversation with just about any hottie. But I shan't go there. I will let me wife respond to my increased 'manliness', if indeed this is a real thing.

[Lifestyle]

Well done Cunning!!
Day 9 for me......

Keep it up.... I'm inspried

[Cunning]

50 Days

It isn't so hard, but trying not to sneak in a peak at some porn is. I'm now less than a week shy of my last (and only) substantial record of 8 weeks AB.

[Cunning]

56 days, 8 weeks, personal record equalled.



No sign of WD, let alone SE. If I'm extremely horny, I might get the slightest seepage of pre-cum. Otherwise, there's nothing, zilch, nada. Not to worry, I'll keep pressing on for an MB free year.

[marshall73]

Wow. Impressive. Congrats on the personal record. I'll use you as proof it can be done. Hang in there.

[Cunning]

60 days

Last night I had strange dreams, and the only remotely sexual bit was being in a hot tub with several people, including a woman who was getting friendly with me. But because there were others in the tub, it was limited to fairly tame underwater footsies. I didn't even get a grope. The dream then progressed into something else altogether and I don't remember getting aroused, nor was there any evidence of any fluid leakage.

This means I can't be ready for a WD yet. As I've never had one, nor AB'd for this long, this is truly uncharted territory for me. Here's to the next 30 days to mark the 90-day milestone.

[Cunning]

70 days and counting.

Well, it's been a record (for me) breaking AB spell of 10 weeks. I've smashed my old record by two whole weeks. Lucid dreams have been far and few between, but I feel strangely at ease with myself. Seeing it could take months for a WD, I hope I don't start to worry about stale semen getting stored up and going nowhere. The usual feeling of fullness is not really noticeable any more (or I've become completely accustomed to it) but I'm assured my hydraulic system is in fine fettle. Let's see what the next 20 days bring.

[Cunning]

12 weeks or 84 days today, so still going strong.

This is completely uncharted territory for me. In the absence of stimuli, I don't get horny at all. No random boners during the day and I feel razor sharp in thought and organisation. It's quite unreal. When I interact with people (mostly at work), I can almost second guess what they are going to say before they say it. I just hope my boldness doesn't get me into strife.

During the weekends, I usually just slump about. But the these last few weeks, I've been not only starting projects - but finishing them in double quick time. Yet, in the back of my mind, I kinda miss the relief of ejaculation. There's no sign of fullness any more, no aches or odd sensations. The only clue that I'm retaining my seed is the occasional seepage of prostatic fluid with my BM if especially firm.

I'm not complaining though. I certainly don't miss the fogginess and general lethargy I used to feel. This time next week will see a full 90 days go by. Then what will I do with myself? Go for 180 days, I guess.

[Cunning]

90 days!

I feel razor sharp in my mind. I have focus, boundless energy and I'm getting things done. The nice thing about this reboot is I've mostly lost the interest to MB. I had been concerned about my libido, but fear not. I still have filthy thoughts when I see a nice specimen of women and I have fully operational erection system - especially in the morning. I have little trouble holding eye contact and just making general, un-creepy conversation with people in lifts, public places and such like.

More interestingly, I'm no longer horny without stimulus. I think this is a good thing, because I don't waste precious time thinking about how to suppress a boner or actually getting it off. The sad thing, though, is there's not a WD in sight. I'm no longer feeling uncomfortably full or achey. In fact, that sensation pretty much disappeared after the first 6 weeks. I guess my body has gotten used to conservation. Maybe I'm one of the unfortunate few destined never to experience a WD. But that's OK, I won't have a mess to clean up.

It would be fair to say I now consider this AB state the norm, and I'm not going to keep a detailed count of the days. It's good enough for me to consider I'm not a wanker any more. Long may it last.

[Lifestyle]

Congratulations Cunning!!!
You're an inspiration to me.

[Cunning]

Congratulations Cunning!!!
You're an inspiration to me.

Thanks, it does get easier and easier over time. The bonus of feeling fantastic ALL THE TIME outweighs the few seconds of selfish pleasure every time. Shared pleasure is another matter. Perhaps the next stage is Karezza ...

[Cunning]

I miss ejaculating, and there's no sign of WD ever making an appearance. Not that I'm actually holding out for one, but it'd be good to know my pipes are still productive.

Speaking of productivity, my work rate is out of this world. I actually feel 5 or more years younger with renewed energy, mental sharpness and clarity. So much so, I wonder if each time some guy talking to me and stumbling on finding the right words might be PMO'ing a bit too much. One day, I might feel stupid or brave enough to ask.

Onwards and upwards, I say ...

[Cunning]

... and still no sign of WD. Feeling great though, and not at all tempted to PMO or MO. But I could really do with a blow-job right now.

[joshie]

that does sound nice! lolllll

[Cunning]

... and all I got was a dream of eating pussy. Nothing wet about that dream either, dammit.

[Cunning]

... it's been 180 days since my last MB. I think my body has taken on the habit of a monk. It's forgotten how to get excited about porn. I got complimented by a couple of women today who said how good I looked. I'm feeling fantastic.

I should have known I'm one of the few destined to never experience a WD. When I AB'd for 8 weeks in my teens, nothing happened except immense frustration. I still remember how mind-blowing that long-awaited MB was. Now, I'm not even remotely interested in MBing, but I do have a huge urge to get laid. It's a very weird place to be in. Feeling horny, but not feeling the urge to help myself.

What next?

[masanopat]

I have come to believe that abstaining from masturbation increases testosterone levels, which in turn has the capability to increase the secretion of pheromones. Probably, this is one of the reasons why you seem to have an accelerated sex appeal towards a love partner. You have to take advantage of this. Why don't you get involve in a romantic relationship? hahaha just saying.

[gone2bed2day]

180 days is truly inspirational!!! It sounds like not having a WD has not deterred you from your mission. Good for you. My only mission at first was to get a WD since I never had one, but now after nearly 35 days, I am reconsidering my goals. Since sex is an option for me, I'm wondering if I'd still get the positive effects of ABIng that you describe. Certainly don't want to say no if the sex opportunity arises... Any speculation why you don't get WDs? I'm beginning to think I'm in the same category as you. My age probably doesn't help. Good luck on your journey nonetheless!!!

[Cunning]

180 days is truly inspirational!!! It sounds like not having a WD has not deterred you from your mission. Good for you. My only mission at first was to get a WD since I never had one, but now after nearly 35 days, I am reconsidering my goals. Since sex is an option for me, I'm wondering if I'd still get the positive effects of ABIng that you describe. Certainly don't want to say no if the sex opportunity arises... Any speculation why you don't get WDs? I'm beginning to think I'm in the same category as you. My age probably doesn't help. Good luck on your journey nonetheless!!!

Thanks for your kind words.

I'm not sure why I'm denied WDs, but I guess a small minority of men are. It might happen to me eventually, so who really knows. In any case, after this period of time of ABing, it's really easy to not think about MB at all. But sex is another matter. I'm all geared up for it, and I guess I should get back into the sack to see if the way I'm feeling now abates with sex.

At the risk of getting ahead of myself, I do believe in the concept of jing and how it is irretrievably lost with each ejaculation. So, even if I should have sex, I think I'd limit my ejaculation to once every few times - if I can help it. Orgasm for me is no longer the goal. It's about connecting with someone, feeling great about life and being energised at all times, without that old familiar pent up feeling of sexual frustration.

It's a really good place to be in. In my case, the benefits started to become obvious after ABing for over 90 days. I might keep going for life and never MB again.

[marshall73]

Really, really interesting post. Thanks for sharing. I might explore some of those ideas and concepts around jing (qing?) because, while I'm only on Day 29, I can sense the power and benefits of holding on to my energy and really exploring the feelings caused by doing so.

Great stuff. Good luck.

[Cunning]

Really, really interesting post. Thanks for sharing. I might explore some of those ideas and concepts around jing (qing?) because, while I'm only on Day 29, I can sense the power and benefits of holding on to my energy and really exploring the feelings caused by doing so.

Great stuff. Good luck.

I'd encourage you to venture beyond 90 days. It's really quite an amazing state to be in. A couple of nights ago, I met an old female friend at my daughter's school production. She saw me, but did not recognise me at first. When I tapped her on her shoulder and reminded her (we're even Facebook buddies) who I was, she almost fell over. Her first unprompted comment was, "oh wow, you look so young and good". That simply reaffirms to me that conservation of my life essence, particularly in my latter years, is truly vital for my ongoing well-being and energy.

I wish I started earlier, but as they say "it's better late than never".