barabara's log: ABing, school, and fantasies

[barabara]

Hi guys, I'm new blood around here I found this board yesterday, and I felt like joining. Hope I'll enjoy my stay here ^^

Due to circumstances (staying with my parents for the holidays), it has been relatively hard for me to MB for the past week. I live in an all-male boarding school for most of the year, and the people there don't really care about what you do with your penis as long as you don't whip it out in front of your roommates, so MB is a habit that's hard to break there. I'm gonna try to get WD (partly cuz I've never had one before) by abstaining as long as I can until January comes when school continues.

This is my first time consciously making an effort to AB. I've managed 5 days so far, but I wake up with a horrible urge to MB every morning I sometimes go on random 3-day AB streaks, but I dunno how far I can go this time.

[tieguy]

welcome and good luck!

[barabara]

Thanks tieguy Good luck to you too, man.

Day 6. Saw somebody say on General Discussion that going to sleep with a boner helps in getting WD (somewhat), so I started thinking about horny stuff once I was comfy on my bed.

Sadly, I don't usually get a boner before sleeping, and trying to get one kind of backfired. I couldn't sleep for another hour (I usually fall asleep 2-3 minutes after getting comfy in bed). I eventually gave up on sleeping with a boner and just let my boner die out. Woke up with a hard-on as usual though.

Today was pretty much easy to get through though, most of it was spent on traveling with my family to my grandparents'. Gonna be staying until Sunday - I wouldn't wanna get a WD during this time. It'd be pretty difficult to conceal the thing.

I haven't encountered any random hard-ons yet. Guess that's a good thing.

[jamesjon]

Welcome to the board, I think you'll find you can get a lot of info and support here if you want it. I know I found it helps to be able to talk to others that are trying to AB as well. Will you try to continue to AB when you get back to school in January (btw that's a nice long break)? Or will you find it difficult when your back and everyone else is MB? I know that's one thing I find hard about sharing a room.

Anyway, enjoy the forum.

Later, JJ

[jim6128]

Welcome to the forum. I'm sure that you will find ample support and encouragement here. There are a lot of helpful tips in the logs or you can use the chat room. Best of luck as you start your journey.

Jim

[riverjacked]

Welcome to the forum barabara! If you really have the desire to get a WD then I'm sure you will be able to AB until then! When I first joined this site it took me till day 17 to get my first WD and the wait (although shorter than some) is well worth it. But you really just can't touch downunder. It's too easy to fail in my opinion. Best of luck in the future days/weeks.

- River

[barabara]

Thanks guys! I try to AB as much as I can during the school year, too. Since there was practically nothing to stop me from MB, for the past two years I've been going at it almost every day though. I'm not really comfortable with the idea though, even if the people around me don't really care. Like I mentioned above, this is my first attempt to consciously AB for more than a week, and I'll probably decide whether to continue MB when school resumes only after I get my WD.

Day 7 - It will have been one full week in about a few hours. Today went pretty smooth as I was hanging out with my cousins. I didn't really have any horny thoughts throughout, but that probably means that I'm still far away from WDs. Do you guys need to have random boners or horny thoughts during the day before you can get a WD?

[barabara]

Day 8 - Last day at grandparents'. Also a pretty easy day to go through, just spent the day sitting around talking with cousins and playing some video games. Not much to report, no random boners yet. I think my urge to MB's receding actually, not sure whether that's a good thing though.

[tieguy]

hey Barabara,

congrats on day 8. keep up the good work! just stay connected to the support here and you will do fine!

Tieguy

[barabara]

Day 9 - Back at parents' house. Woke up at 5 a.m. to catch the early train cuz both my parents had work early in the morning and I wanted to tag along. This turned out to be quite stupid because I was half dead throughout the entire trip because I didn't have enough sleep. It's been more than 12 hours since then and I haven't gotten a single minute of sleep yet. Probably gonna get a deep, early sleep.

Abstaining feels pretty easy now. I was pretty close to giving myself a few strokes though, cuz I kind of missed the feeling. I did manage to hold myself back, and the urge died down pretty quickly too. Cleaned the area under my foreskin for the first time in a few weeks today - it wasn't as bad as I expected, cuz for me water can usually get under my foreskin when I bathe/shower, which I supposed helped a lot.

I also noticed this interesting trend that whenever I start abstaining, my scalp would start to flake excessively and itch. I suppose that this is a consequence of hormonal changes in my body to accommodate not masturbating everyday like I used to in the school dorms, but it's getting a bit annoying I'll see how things go, I guess.

[barabara]

Day 10.

Actually, before talking about Day 10, I wanna talk about what happened last night after I typed the previous post.

By Day 8, I was getting quite worried because abstaining was a bit TOO easy for me. Nothing really happened, there were no random boners, and I didn't have much of an urge to MB. It was amazing in a sense, considering that I was so dependent on MB during the school year that sometimes I relied purely on MB for stress relief. I was worried, however, because I didn't have half the trouble that I've been reading in others' logs on this board, with some having aching balls or strong urges to MB. I was especially worried because I didn't even have the boner that I used to have before going to sleep Basically, I was impatient because I was worried that I might not get a WD even after abstaining for 30+ days. I decided to go look at some porn cuz I figured horny thoughts might speed the process up.

That turned out to be a really bad decision. Looking at porn made my urge to MB so strong, my hands just immediately reached into my pants and start stroking my penis. I could feel my body heating up, my breathing was faster, and my heart rate was over the roof. The drive was so strong my logic turned to mush, and it felt like I was going to shoot my load with just one or two strokes.

But I managed to stop myself. Not because my logic magically returned or something. It was 2.30am, and both my parents were asleep. I could very well shoot my load right there. After 'Heck it, I'm gonna shoot', the first thing that came to my mind was actually 'This is gonna be a pain in the ass to clean up.' So I just stopped. My laziness prevented me from MB last night, and looking back, I guess I'm thankful for that. I still found it hard to fall asleep last night though, cuz my penis was hard for the rest of the night as a result of looking at the porn.

It's 9.45pm now. Day 10 has been pretty smooth so far (I always say that, lol). Spent the entire day watching The Walking Dead and some anime (yes, anime) episodes that I missed out due to the trip to grandparents' house a few days ago. Gonna watch Hangover 2 now, I never did watch it when it was showing in the cinemas. I guess showers and sleep after that.

[barabara]

Back on the board after a 4.5-month absence.

To recap what happened during the past few 4.5 months, it was basically an almost-daily MB routine, starting with the end of day 10 above, November 28th. Apparently, your parents' presence doesn't really work well as a limiter to your MB desires, cuz when they both leave the house (which happened on day 11) and you're all alone, it's extremely difficult not to control yourself. Day 11 was one such day for me, and I lost it. Quickly opened up some porn and jerked the life out of me. After that, it was basically just daily MB every night when the entire house was asleep, and that easily carried on into the school year in the dorms (and everybody's MBing so the limiter's practically gone). The guilt got to me at first, (which was why I stopped posting on my log altogether) but once school started there was a lot of work coming in and I just stopped caring altogether.

Around the end of March this year, I decided to give it another try though, this time doing it properly. So I started ABing, and so far it's not been easy. I almost lost it a couple of times during Days 9-10, but somehow managed to contain myself. Today's Day 13 for me, 3 days further than my previous attempt.

I saw some articles posted in other sections of the forum about the body/brain having to take 'reset' its hormonal distribution after going cold turkey on MBing. I guess the reorientation is almost complete now, as I've been experiencing less urges to MB since Days 9-10. I have a feeling I can go on for a while this time around. So yeah, even though I'm usually busy with school work and probably not gonna update daily, do stay tuned for more =)

Oh and, I'm feeling slight aches in my testicles today. I suppose this is what people call blue balls? Though if it actually is blue balls, then it's setting in really early.

[Texanguy]

Welcome back, and good luck in your pursuit of a WD. I find it interesting that MB is common and accepted in the dorms, and that 'everybody' does it. But I suspect that there must be a few who don't MB, or at least not very often. Does anyone ever mention having WDs and that they enjoy them?

Guys who don't have the MB habit don't experience the 'post-MB letdown'. Some of them tend to enjoy their bodies more, and may be among those who 'push the nudity envelope' while maintaining erection control. They might also joke about WDs more than most, and even talk about a good WD they had. So if you encounter any guys like that in the dorms, you may be seeing guys who have sex in WDs as their outlet rather than MB. And as we've learned here at this site, their WDs are more intense, exciting, and enjoyable than any MB.

So if you see any guys like that, perhaps they can help inspire you to move to WDs yourself. Good luck!

[barabara]

Welcome back, and good luck in your pursuit of a WD. I find it interesting that MB is common and accepted in the dorms, and that 'everybody' does it. But I suspect that there must be a few who don't MB, or at least not very often. Does anyone ever mention having WDs and that they enjoy them?

Guys who don't have the MB habit don't experience the 'post-MB letdown'. Some of them tend to enjoy their bodies more, and may be among those who 'push the nudity envelope' while maintaining erection control. They might also joke about WDs more than most, and even talk about a good WD they had. So if you encounter any guys like that in the dorms, you may be seeing guys who have sex in WDs as their outlet rather than MB. And as we've learned here at this site, their WDs are more intense, exciting, and enjoyable than any MB.

So if you see any guys like that, perhaps they can help inspire you to move to WDs yourself. Good luck!

I haven't seen any guys like that in my dorm, sadly. I suppose there must be at least a number of these people here in the dorms, but it's not really a topic that you'd bring up in a general conversation, if you know what I mean. People joke about MB here, but I have never, in my 4 years living in the same dorms with pretty much the same people, heard anybody mention a WD they experienced.

I do have a guy friend though (also living in the dorms) who I regularly swap porn with (he and I are popular among our friends as the mega-horny dudes). We joke about MB regularly too. He's pro-MB, though he MBs only once or twice a week (in his own words, 'it feels better when you keep a healthy routine'). He was pretty amused when I told him I was starting an AB streak, and I've been reminding him of this everyday. Having somebody who actually listens to you talking about ABing, even if it's just "SUP BIT*H IM AT DAY 12" does motivate you somewhat!

I think one of the reasons why my first attempt at getting a WD failed is that there's too much uncertainty in getting a WD at all - reading the logs here, I have seen some people get WDs almost every week or so, and some others going for months without any WDs. The uncertainty is one thing that's really discouraging to those who haven't gotten a WD before. The reason why I'm quite affected by this is because during winter two years ago, I almost got a WD. Almost, because I had set my alarm clock to 4am before going to sleep for some reason, and I was almost reaching the point of ejaculation when the alarm went off. The shock/surprise of hearing the alarm go off in the middle of the night prevented me from continuing the WD. The weird thing, though, is that I had MBed furiously before going to sleep earlier that night, and every night before that for almost a month. That made me seriously doubt that ABing and WD are related.

Also, one thing I've noted is that after consciously making an effort to AB and failing, you tend to appreciate the dopamine release from MB much more. What this means is that, you focus a lot more on the pleasure that the orgasm gives you, and you almost don't feel the post-MB letdown at all for some reason. That's one of the reasons why I went for 4.5 months MBing everyday after failing to AB - returning to MB after ABing makes MBing feels much better. I guess "You don't appreciate something until you've lost it" applies here, though I dunno if that's good or bad in this case - I'll have to experience a full WD to find out, I guess.

[barabara]

My bad, yesterday was Day 14. Not much to talk about Day 15, though I find it interesting that I've only had one or two random boners in school so far in this round of ABing.

Welcome back to the boards barbara! Always glad to see an "oldie" come back for another go. You definitely bring up some good points. The one regarding your uncertainty of AB as a viable option related to the apparent randomness of WDs is a big concern for many people. I think it's dependent on everyone's personal goals for AB, but my feeling is, AB should be about the experience itself, and learning to not only live with, but to enjoy AB and the changes you see as a result. To me WDs are just kind of a bonus or trophy to drive home the point. I say this all hypothetically as I've not had a WD yet, MB remains a challenge for me to get past, even up to 30 days of AB; but I can still definitely say that for me AB even by itself is worth the work. Hopefully you can find what works for you and get the support you need, either in "real life" or here on the boards.

Hi! Thanks for reading through my badly written post (was somewhat sleepy when I wrote it) I've nothing against MB personally, save for the fatigue that I sometimes feel after MB, and of course the post-MB letdown. As I've already said in the earlier post though, my failed AB attempt in fact made MB feel even more amazing, and the post-MB letdown was virtually nonexistent too. I don't really view MB negatively, and the dopamine rush is always welcome. I began this second attempt in some parts because I felt that I needed a break from daily MB, but still mostly because I wanted an WD.

After attempting to AB and failing, I'm pretty sure I'll resume with a daily MB sooner or later, even if I get an WD and continue to AB for some time after that. One of the reasons for the failure of my first attempt was that I was unsure of how much control I can exert on myself, and now that I know how I can lose control, for now, I'm just pushing as far as I can while having not-so-high expectations. Hopefully, this time my efforts will pay off

[barabara]

Day 16 passed without a lot of trouble. Feeling almost no urge to MB or look at porn now. Not much precum yet though.

I haven't been dreaming a lot lately, actually, or maybe the dreams are just not powerful enough to stay in my memory after waking up. I've been sleeping 5-6 hours a day on average, going to sleep at 1-2am and waking up at 7 for school.

[barabara]

Day 18 was HOT and HUMID as hell. It's the kind of weather that saps your stamina real quickly and you don't wanna do anything and just sleep, but even sleeping feels horrible cuz it's just too hot and you wake up sweaty and your brain feels numb afterwards. Everybody, including the teachers, was irritable and just wanted lessons to end as soon as possible. Luckily school ended early today (1pm).

Came back to my room at around 1.30 after a relatively hearty lunch at the school cafeteria. Woke up at 6pm with a raging boner and loads of precum. Got up, peed, and tried to go back to sleep (cuz it was still hot as hell at 6). I lied there half asleep for about half an hour, and somehow I thought of having a threesome with these two cute girls from my acappella group in school. The image was relatively vivid (well, as vivid as one can get while only half asleep), though it was nowhere close to a wet dream. I opened my eyes again around half an hour later with the same raging boner and even more precum. Been feeling really active since that 30-minute 'fantasy session', totally opposite to the fatigue I felt in school earlier; this must be the T-buzz in action Probably gonna hit the gym or go for a run tonight.

[barabara]

Day 20's over! Again, not feeling much resistance against AB recently. I looked at porn for a couple of minutes yesterday because I felt quite bored, and got a slight hardon, but that was it. Absolutely no desire to whip out the dick and do a quick whack like I used to do (and to be honest, my roommates weren't even coming back until much later, so I had all the time in the world to wank, if I wanted to). Wore boxers to sleep last night and woke up with raging morning wood and loads of precum. Smooth sailing so far, and much more successful compared to my last attempt!

I've been getting more and more sexual images in my dreams more oftenly in these past two days too, though none of them even close to the intensity of a WD. During the weekdays I rarely have enough sleep, so I doubt I'll get a WD during the next 4-5 days, but I'm looking forward to the weekend (don't we all? ). It seems, from reading the logs on this board, the chances of getting a WD are much larger after passing the 21-day threshold. But then, since I had been MBing on an almost daily basis until 20 days ago, I suppose my brain will take quite long to rewire. Either way, I've been enjoying the T-buzz, so it's all good.

[barabara]

Alright, the past week has been a relatively hectic one, which is why I haven't been posting since Day 20. Today marks the beginning of the weekend

So right after I wrote the previous post about Day 20 about half an hour past midnight, I came back to my school work and realized that I had a truckload of work to finish by morning. So I just sat at my desk and did my work until 6AM. I had a 1-hour sleep, woke up at 7 and got ready for school and, of course, Day 21.

Day 21 was really difficult, mostly because I had had almost no sleep at all. I had pulled consecutive allnighters before this though, so it's really nothing new. I walked around school and sat in class with my eyes half closed, but still got through lessons without falling asleep. Sleep deprivation horribly overturns your daily activities, though. I couldn't take a dump throughout the entire day, I couldn't think or concentrate properly when I tried to work. I took a cold shower at about 11PM but that didn't work at all; I just dried my hair and went straight to sleep. I went straight into deep sleep and woke up at 6.30AM refreshed.

In contrast to Day 21, Days 22, 23 and 24 were easy to get through. I took a lot of naps too, mostly 5.30-6PM to dinner. I briefly modified my sleep schedule a bit too: I usually did a lot of work during the night before going to sleep, so I usually go to sleep at 2-3AM and wake up at 7AM, but for these three days I went to sleep at 11PM and set an alarm to wake up at around 4.30-5AM to do work. This didn't work too well, though. I just surfed the net for random stuff after waking up and ended up with only about half an hour to do work. I did get a lot more sleep to compensate for the sleep deprivation though, and I frequently had random boners during those three days.

Which brings me to Day 25.

Day 25 began with a really warm shower, no breakfast and rushing to school. I had lessons from 8 to 9.20 AM, and then I went back to my room to take my laptop cuz I had to use it for a lesson later on during the day. I grabbed some breakfast, too, and stayed in my room until 10AM and came back to class to find out that the teacher wasn't around, so I had free time until 11.20AM to do whatever I want. I ended up playing Starcraft II with a classmate, and then went for the last lesson of the day, which was from 11.20 to 1PM.

Immediately after school, inside my room, I went to the Internet to check on Facebook, Twitter and whatnot. I also stumbled on some really good porn. I went on to read about this 3D adult game called Sexy Beach Zero (wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexy_Beach_Zero), and was impressed with the character design of the blue-haired girl on the boxart, and I became really horny. With my dick rock hard, I went to take a nap at around 2-3PM and intended to sleep all the way until dinner.

I had a dream/nightmare, a really vivid one, and really fantastical too. I was in school at night alone, checking on random lockers. There was another presence, behind the lockers, of a ghost girl a la The Ring, but instead of popping out from the television, the ghost would crawl out from a random locker and attack the person next to it. I could see the face of the ghost in glass doors and windows along the locker corridor. I was driven by something else though, something that I had to do. I searched many lockers, opened them, closed them as fast as I could. I could feel the ghost moving behind me within the space inside the lockers. If I didn't move fast enough, she would catch up with me and jump out of the locker. I would die. The space inside the lockers felt endless and dark, as if I could reach inside and wouldn't be able to touch the back of the locker. Finally, after checking many lockers one by one and finding nothing, I found a vial of glowing liquid inside a locker in the middle of the corridor.

The scene suddenly changed, as if in a movie. From the dark, cold but wide feel of the school locker area at night, I was suddenly inside a small room, with space to fit at most five sitting persons. Straw mats line the wooden floor, and wooden pillars were at the four corners of the room, with sliding paper doors connecting them like in a Japanese castle. The room was filled with a dull yellow light as if from a night light, and the floor was a bit slanted and rugged, as if I was sitting on some sort of wooden stairs. After walking around the room, I saw somebody standing next to me. It was the cover art girl of the adult game I saw before going to sleep (her name's Bael btw), but instead of having blue hair, her hair was purple. The vial dropped from my hand to the floor, but didn't break. We started having sex. When I was about to come, I distinctively remember thinking "Ahh, heck, my AB routine's broken" (I'm serious! ). I came inside her, pulled out, and a fountain of semen continued to spurt out from my penis, covering her body and splattering on the paper doors and wooden floor.

Scene shift again, back to the cold, dark locker corridor, though I was with Bael this time. She was dressed in kunoichi (female ninja) clothes and had a Japanese sword in her hand. I could feel the ghost behind the lockers still, but it was far away, as if aware that I had somebody else with me at that time. There were locks all over the lockers now, but I could yank them open within about half a minute. I was taking my time then, opening each and every locker, knowing that the ghost could not touch me now. Inside one of the lockers, I found a basin containing the same glowing liquid as the vial. Along with Bael, I took the basin out of the locker and dropped the vial inside the liquid. It sank down and disappeared within the basin. We put the basin back inside the locker.

I woke up. It was 6PM. I felt like falling asleep again. But something didn't feel right. I reached inside my briefs and scratched my balls, and realized that my briefs were wet and sticky.

So here I am, 3 hours later, retelling my first wet dream here with as much detail as I can remember. It was a surreal one, and it was great fun. I immediately went into the shower to wash myself up. I started edging once inside the shower, and it became fullblown MB. I shot loads and loads of semen inside the shower, rinsed my body thoroughly, and went for dinner.

I pretty much blew my AB immediately after I had the WD. It was extremely fun though. I feel almost zero sexual desire right now, but I have no idea how tomorrow will be like. Still hoping I can resume ABing as soon as possible, maybe in a couple of weeks, or maybe even starting from tomorrow. But for now, my T-buzz has drained and I'll probably go to sleep. I'll keep on posting here though even if I'm not ABing. See you all tomorrow!

[Ronald]

Congrats on your 1st wet dream!

[Texanguy]

Congratulations on your first WD! And thanks for the detailed description.

It's too bad that you MB'd after, since the best way to get more WDs is to keep abstaining. You got your WD relatively quickly, which might mean that you could get them frequently. Some guys get several WDs per week, and even two in one night, especially around your age. Guys getting into WDs often say that they become more intense and more real as they continue to abstain. Another thing they say is that the semen volume increases over time to more than they can get from MB.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do. But you appear to be lucky enough to get WDs easier than most, and I'm sure most of us here would recommend that you go for it.

[barabara]

Thanks guys! Back on ABing, Day 2 just ended a few hours ago. Gonna go to bed soon. My penis has become pretty sensitive again, completely opposite from the few days before I had the WD last week. Feeling medium horniness since beginning of AB, will probably peak at Day 9 or 10. No idea how I'll hold out.

[barabara]

Currently in Day 5. Not much report about, except that my penis already seems to be losing sensitivity (which is a good thing, less arousal). I've been sleeping a lot these days too, and not exercising at all. Better keep the T-buzz going!

[nicsh]

Congrats on your first wd! Barabara!

I abs for about the same amount of time and I wasn't lucky enough to get the WD. I gave in to MB. Now I'm on day 2 hopefully it'll work this time.

[barabara]

Thanks nicsh! Hang in there, and hope you don't lose yourself this time

Currently Day 10. The most difficult times are close, from what I've observed during my last AB attempts. This weekend's likely to be the most dangerous; no idea how I'll fare. T-buzz still nowhere to be found, frequent hard-ons during the past week anywhere I go, little precum: I'm still far from WD, apparently. Perseverance!

I had a nightmare this morning / last night. I was watching over a train platform at night when a girl was standing on the stairs to the platform. There were people wearing white and having pale skin walking around the stairs, but the girl didn't pay much attention to them. Suddenly, the white people gathered in front of her and started staring at her. The girl panicked, and ran onto the train tracks. A train came (duh) and the girl managed to dodge the train by about an inch, but she suddenly tripped and fell, her head on the track rails, between the wheels of the train. Her head got immediately squashed by the train wheels, and her body flew upward and onto the train roof. Three other people (not the white people) came running, and they were killed by another train hitting them.

No idea what the dream meant. What's weird was that the entire dream was in 2D: all the people inside were low-res sprites as if they came from Final Fantasy 6 or the older Zelda games, and I'm just an invisible guy watching from above; this is a first for me. After I woke up from the dream, it felt as if I had been watching a scenario from Corpse Party. It's a really good game, no idea what it's doing in my dreams though; the last time I touched the game was about two months ago.

[barabara]

Day 12 now. Still coasting with surprisingly little trouble regarding ABing. I'm having hardons before going to sleep every night now, but still no blue balls yet - I get boners, but there's no pain in the balls when I get an erection yet. Before I got my WD last month, I was having moderate blue balls. So, no sign of WDs yet.

A point of note. For the past 3-4 days, whenever I peed, immediately as I shoved my penis back inside my pants, I felt a tingle inside the penis, about 1/4 of the length away from the tip:

3==========here===>

It was the same sensation that you get immediately before you start peeing if you have been holding off from peeing for 2+ hours, as if there was extra pressure in the urethra. The tingle persisted for 10-15 seconds and then disappeared.

In a way, the sensation was like feeling like peeing, even though I had just finished peeing before getting it. This was getting persistent, and so when I felt that sensation again, I tried pulling my penis out and push out whatever was inside. A small drop of liquid came out. I suppose the remaining drop of liquid was what caused the tingle, because it immediately stopped as the drop came out. I didn't give much thought to this, because I thought it was just extra pee that didn't exit the penis. Afterwards, whenever I felt the tingle, I would just try to push the last drop out, and a drop did come out every time.

Yesterday, I noticed that this last drop didn't feel exactly like pee - it was more 'slimy' and more sticky - so I made a mental note to pay more attention to the drop later. Today, I looked at the drop as it exited the penis, and it appeared to have a pale white color like semen.

If I'm not wrong, this is an SE? Cuz if so, it appears as if my body has learned to excrete semen while I'm peeing, instead of building it up for a WD. This is quite troublesome, cuz it happens quite persistently, almost every time I pee. If there's no semen buildup, I suppose the WD will come much later. More detail later.

[barabara]

Thanks 95Percent! I was probably overreacting when I talked about the cumdrop thingy. Apparently, getting aroused is the actual cause of the cumdrop; the end of Day 12 saw a large drop in my sexual desire, and my dick has stayed mostly deflated until now, quite the contrast with the frequent random boners around 5-6 days ago. Ever since then, the extra cumdrop also disappeared completely. I suppose the cumdrop was there because cum was hastily pumped up while I was watching porn and getting aroused in general.

Anyways, Day 14 just ended about an hour ago. These couple days have been really busy, as I had loads of stuff to do with the a cappella group and schoolwork in general. I haven't had a complete 7-hour sleep in these 2 days, instead I find myself dozing off every now and then and sleeping a maximum of 2-3 hours as I had to stay up late and do work (partly because I mostly lazed around during the weekend ). Frequency of random boners dropped significantly, as mentioned above, to about once per day, maybe because I have not much stamina left to even trigger a boner. I haven't had time to look at porn. Heck, I'm so busy I haven't time to even stroke my dick. After this week, though, it's all easy work, until the term break when I'll be leaving the dorms for home for a couple weeks of rest.

Sleep deprivation really strips me of mental clarity, and it's not really light on my physical wellbeing either. Typing this post merely provides me with a little break in the midst of the overwhelming workload. The sooner this busy week ends the better...

[barabara]

Day 16 now. The weekend just started about half an hour ago! Managed to survive the week.

Random boners started popping up again yesterday, together with the first cases of blueballs during this AB. Also, just as expected, the post-urination cum came back in full force. I'm peeing about 2-3 drops of cum now; horniness still low though, thankfully. Time for some deep sleep & hopefully a WD!

[barabara]

Day 17 is gonna end in a couple of hours. I went out to celebrate a good friend's birthday! Had a lot of fun and crashed right after I came back to my dorm room. Just woke up and really hungry.

Horniness relatively low today & the post-pee cumdrop wasn't around. I guess you don't really feel like wanking if you're too busy doing other stuff

[barabara]

Day 20 just started a few hours ago! Strange; I'm feeling a lot hornier than I did around this period for the last AB. Maybe I should start applying the 3-second rule already. Of course, to the very WD itself I was still looking at porn every now and then, and it did end up affecting the dream itself after all.

If I go by the pattern of the last AB, the WD should be near, though I have a hunch I won't be getting a WD until after Day 30 for this AB. No idea why though. Either way, this time 'round I'll probably try to stretch the AB even after the WD, at least until I get another WD; I wanna confirm the rumor that if you keep on AB'ing after getting a WD, the frequency and intensity of WDs start to increase.

For now, though, the goal is still to keep sexual thoughts to a minimum :>