I will do it this time.

[googoogchoo]

You're doing great

[determined11]

Thanks for the heads up googoogchoo


47 days no MB
33 days no edging with my hands.
16 days no touch no stimulation whatsoever!!!


Nothing new but I came here to update my counters because it gives me more motivation to continue. Previously I used to fight to keep my MB-free days moving. Now I am keen on keeping my no-touch whatsoever days moving up as well. Coming now and updating my counters distracts me from giving up. I learnt from the past that the first concession leads to another one: you first start with a touch, it feels good. Next few touches, it feels even better. Then more touches until you edge. Then you keep edging and fight just not to reach the point of no-return and MB. I am trying to cut this cycle from its root, simply fight not to touch by any mean, either by hand, humping the bed, etc, whatever the mean is, just fight it. and I have been doing great here.

Last week, I had the worst headache I had since decades. I have no idea why. I am fighting this headache as much as I can so that I can focus on my life. It was not a nice week. I am feeling much better this week and I am trying to catch up on my life and work. I am not sure what is the reason behind this headache. Probably, I was just exhausted...

[googoogchoo]

For the headache you can try something soothing like massaging your head with warm water or covering your ears and listening to water falling on your head.

[determined11]

For the headache you can try something soothing like massaging your head with warm water or covering your ears and listening to water falling on your head.

thanks, I will try that

[determined11]

51 days no MB
37 days no edging with my hands.
20 days no touch no stimulation whatsoever!!!

some temptations over the last few days. I resisted. Enjoyed the feelings when it came but didn't act on it and stimulate myself. by far 3 weeks with no stimulations (touch, edge, bed-humping, you name it) is a record for me and the reason I am keeping it up here is to try not to stop the streak and keep it going!

T-buzz is good, would never trade it for a short-high that edging, MB and the linkes bring! not again! doesn't worth it!

[determined11]

53 days no MB (Record is 311)
39 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
22 days no touch no stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)


Yet another day passe by. A day in my journey away from lust, a step further towards freeing my soul from being a slave to my vain desires. A move form the fantasy world I used to inhabit when I want to escape from life pressure, stress and problems. Yet the question is still hanging around: can I resist the temptations and triumph over all obstacles and attain the stimulation-free life? Time will tell. 22 days with no stimulation whatsoever is a recent record for me. But in my mid 20s, I did 9 months AB, yes 9 months, with no stimulation whatsoever until I got a WD. then followed by another months and half with no stimulations then I MB'ed and back to normal. Can I break that almsot 10.5 months with no stimulations? I will add my best numbers above to motivate and humble myself.

[determined11]

59 days no MB (Record is 311)
45 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
28 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation.


close to 2 months total AB, one month total-stimulation free.

Now I need more discipline. I DON'T watch porn anyhow, but I check out girls of course in the streets a lot. I do also indulge myself a bit when I see something hot online (not porn though). I am trying to work on that. I mean I am trying not to tourture myself, by forcing myself to be horny. so I am trying to stop checking girls in the streets and stop seeking hot stuff online (again no porn already for me).

That would be tough, but if I can achieve that then my record will sky-rocket. That is how I reached 311 days above.I just blocked all stimulations, physically and mentally and worked on my spirituality. That gave me more energy and focus on my life. Of course, I was not able to eleminate getting horny when I see a pretty girl or so, but I don't seek it, that it, I don't say,lets go to this place to check the girls. There i really a big difference. If the moment comes naturally, I will enjoy the feeling, but I am not going to create it.

That would be a tough counter, since this is a larger addiction.

Lets see. I don't know how to advance this counter or what breaks it. But putting it here, even if I am not advancing it will motivate me. Let me start by no online stimulation. That is easier. I mean while I am online, I am not checking hot stuff or seeking it.

[ang]

Have u had ur WD then?

[determined11]

Have u had ur WD then?

I only had one WD after I AB for 9 months. but no WD in this AB so far.

[determined11]

60 days no MB (Record is 311)
46 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
29 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
1 days no online stimulation.


I would say 1 day no online stimulation. I am still struggling not to indulge if I see a hot girl photo in my feeds at facebook or on youtube when I am checking random videos. I am conscious so to this so I would still count it as 1 day.

[RonaldReagan]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this journey with us! I am also trying to eliminate porn, erotic stories, etc. I believe doing that, as well as AB from MB, def. increases the frequency of WD and makes one feel better about oneself, more productive.

[googoogchoo]

Good luck with the no online stimulation part

[determined11]

Thanks, Googoogchoo, and RonaldReagan for the support.

64 days no MB (Record is 311)
50 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
33 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation. (recent record 3 days)

Failed the last one recently. When I was avoiding any online stimulation, I was much more focused, clear-minded and have no urge to think about sexual thoughts. In the last two days, I had tons of those thoughts. I am trying to go back to enforce that rule. The good thing about setting strict rules for oneself is that once you broke it, you feel guilty and don't break the next rule. So here we go, I am already feeling guilty for indulging myself in checking girls, not even touching myself, not even edging, and not even MB, which is far away in the list.

[Hound]

Hey keep it up! You are doing awesome! I can't believe your record for not touching or stimulating yourself is over 300 days! That's incredible! Heck, the fact that you haven't physically stimulated yourself for the past 33 days is amazing. I admire your strength and determination and hope to someday be able to be like that.

[determined11]

Hey keep it up! You are doing awesome! I can't believe your record for not touching or stimulating yourself is over 300 days! That's incredible! Heck, the fact that you haven't physically stimulated yourself for the past 33 days is amazing. I admire your strength and determination and hope to someday be able to be like that.

Thanks Hound. The longer you lear to control your desire, the easier it gets. Read the link I will post below, it explains everything.

[determined11]

http://yourbrainonporn.com
The most important site you should check to stop MB and all addictions

I learnt about this link form RonaldReadan journal. I do NOT watch born and I am NOT a born addict, ever have been and ever will be. BUT as everyone here, I have what gets me ON things. But regardless, the exact same things written in this website, applies to me and to anyone here if you replace born with what turns you on (other than sex). According to the site, scientists discovered that all addiciotns affect the brain the same way. That site helped me understand why I feel good when I AB, and why I feel even better when I Stop edgyign. It explained why I even felt super dupper when I stopped any online stimulations. All of us have build a deep rut in our brain that get activated only with our addiction, and by AB form all sources that activate this rut, we "reboot" our brain to norma. Now I understand how I rebooted my brain back in my 300+ days streak of NO NO NO for everythign. and how I F**ed up my brain again recently. I have been rebooting my brain now since I started to AB again, but now I have more drive to no reset my NO online stimulation counter again, since this is the path to rebooting my brain and restoring my energy and potential as a human being.

READ the link. It is AWESOME!

[determined11]

http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting

"When you remove a source of pleasure from the brain, it is like taking away the leg of a table. The whole thing becomes rocky and unstable. The brain really has two options: one, to make you hurt like hell in every way it can think of to 'encourage' you to put the table leg back again, or two, to accept that the table leg is really gone, and figure out how to re-balance without it. Of course, it tries option one first. Then, after a while, it starts to get to work on option two, all while still pushing option one in the meantime. Eventually, it seems like the brain re-balances, giving up on option one, and fully succeeding at option two."

[determined11]

http://yourbrainonporn.com/rewire-your- ... euroscienc

Rewiring Your Brain


"I am finding that fantasy, for me, is the final thread that must be cut to truly detach myself from the grip of porn. Unfortunately it seems to be the strongest of all threads. Giving up porn was like throwing my poor brain off of the boat into a life boat. Giving up Masturbation was like throwing him into the water with a floaty. It feels like when I let go of the fantasies, my brain is going "Hey, WHAT THE HELL MAN!" as I withdraw the floaty. And then it's into the deep! This is what I experienced between days 16 to today (21): flatline.

It has been so tempting to relapse into fantasy because, I have this feeling that the only way I can attain a spontaneous erection (which is the only kind I am allowing myself to have for now) is to dwell on sexual fantasy. The brain craves it more and more as you try to stop. The good news is (bad news for the impatient) is that as you let go of fantasy and begin to allow reality to take its place, your mind begins to become less sensitive to the fantasies. Unfortunately, I am finding that it loses sensitivity to the fantasies before it begins to embrace reality resulting in a temporary period of time where it seems that nothing is stimulating (flatline)."

replace born with your online stimulus and you get a statement that is true for everyone. I did that and I exactly feel what he is talking about. Patience is the key. stopping fantasy is the hardest part!

[determined11]

68 days no MB (Record is 311)
54 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
37 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation. (recent record 4 days -- ended a few minutes ago!!!)

still working on the online erotica and fantasy thing. was doing VERY well in the last four days, but few hours ago and I had some online eroitca (for some other people, what I viewed is nothing, and normal. but for me it is what turns me on so I consider it as a deal breaker)

overall feeling stronger than before in front of my own desire. my brain is being rewired so i need more time ..

The reason I decided to update after i broke my no erotica record is to remind myself that it is now 0 even though it was 4 minutes ago. gotta keep it real.

[determined11]

68 days no MB (Record is 311)
54 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
37 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation. (recent record 4 days -- ended a few minutes ago!!!)

still working on the online erotica and fantasy thing. was doing VERY well in the last four days, but few hours ago and I had some online eroitca (for some other people, what I viewed is nothing, and normal. but for me it is what turns me on so I consider it as a deal breaker)

overall feeling stronger than before in front of my own desire. my brain is being rewired so i need more time ..

The reason I decided to update after i broke my no erotica record is to remind myself that it is now 0 even though it was 4 minutes ago. gotta keep it real.

A reminder to myself:

"When you remove a source of pleasure from the brain, it is like taking away the leg of a table. The whole thing becomes rocky and unstable. The brain really has two options: one, to make you hurt like hell in every way it can think of to 'encourage' you to put the table leg back again, or two, to accept that the table leg is really gone, and figure out how to re-balance without it. Of course, it tries option one first. Then, after a while, it starts to get to work on option two, all while still pushing option one in the meantime. Eventually, it seems like the brain re-balances, giving up on option one, and fully succeeding at option two."

ok, my brain, it is either you or me this time, lets see who will win. I will have to "think" about how to beat you B**

[Banana phone]

Edging and masturbation loses my motivation to abstinate. Very big reason why I abstinate is the different feeling I get compared to the regular "satisfied" feeling. I lose this feeling when I edge and touch myself. I found it very easy to keep hands off when tell myself firmly so. But I watch porn, I have no problems with that.

[RonaldReagan]

Thanks for following my log. I'm so glad you found the web site yourbrainonporn.com informative and beneficial! I think it is an excellent site...porn addiction is a bigger problem than anybody realizes. I didn't realize I had an addiction until it was too late. Actually, it's never too late to turn back and get back on the right path. Rewiring the brain to enjoy sex more than porn and MB can take as little as 2-3 months of detox with no PMO.

[determined11]

Edging and masturbation loses my motivation to abstinate. Very big reason why I abstinate is the different feeling I get compared to the regular "satisfied" feeling. I lose this feeling when I edge and touch myself. I found it very easy to keep hands off when tell myself firmly so. But I watch porn, I have no problems with that.

thansk Banana phone for the post. I don't watch porn but I watch other stuff that turns me on, but i found myself much better if i close that door as well. heck hard, but i am working on it.

[determined11]

Thanks for following my log. I'm so glad you found the web site yourbrainonporn.com informative and beneficial! I think it is an excellent site...porn addiction is a bigger problem than anybody realizes. I didn't realize I had an addiction until it was too late. Actually, it's never too late to turn back and get back on the right path. Rewiring the brain to enjoy sex more than porn and MB can take as little as 2-3 months of detox with no PMO.

it is amazing, it applied to any kind of sexual addition not onlyport but any kind of fetish. i found the description there to be very accurate esplially about the movelity thing and seeking new form of pleasure, etc.

yep, trying to rewire my brain.

[determined11]

77 days no MB (Record is 311)
63 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
46 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation. (recent record 4 days, working on that)


one and half month no touch whatsoever. feels good. hope i can survive

[determined11]

79 days no MB (Record is 311)
65 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
48 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)
0 days no online stimulation. (recent record 4 days, working on that)

very grumpy and irritable these days for no good reason!

[googoogchoo]

Try getting your brain excited by getting yourself cold, exercising, stuyding, concentrating on something. I find it really helps alot, it might help you with the frustration and irritability. Anyway you know I'm still only one or two days behind you with AB so we can compare

[determined11]

Long time no update.

Thanks Googoochoo and 6years127 for the heads up. I hope you are still AB googoochoo


92 days no MB (Record is 311)
78 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
61 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)



3 months is not my best record by a long shot. My recent best numbers are around 126 last year and 80 days 2 years ago. so this is almost the third. However, 61 days with no physical stimulation (touch, hump, etc) is indeed a big record. I don't remember I did that since 7 years or so. Even in my AB streak last year, I did edge everyday with my hands. now I am hands free for 78 days. WOW

It is getting easier as time goes by. I am trying to keep myself busy, also I don't feel any urge to touch myself, well to be more accurate, of course from time to time, I want to do it, or even hump the bed, but is it easier to fight back now and resist the temptation than before.

Also, I am trying to enter my third phase and try to control my thoughts and online activities. Trying to stop sexual thoughts, stop indulging in looking at girls and checking them in streets, etc. I need a relationship badly now. I need to have a whole girl in my life. I didn't have that urge before.. well I had it of course, but MB, watching girls online, etc kills that urge... now the urge is bigger. And yes, I am not ABing for a WD, I am Aing for a better me, a better life, and a new person.

My mental focus is in the sky and I am trying to leverage that.

good luck to everyone.

[maktub100]

Long time no update.

Thanks Googoochoo and 6years127 for the heads up. I hope you are still AB googoochoo


92 days no MB (Record is 311)
78 days no edging with my hands. (Record is 311)
61 days no touch no physical stimulation whatsoever!!! (Record is 311)



3 months is not my best record by a long shot. My recent best numbers are around 126 last year and 80 days 2 years ago. so this is almost the third. However, 61 days with no physical stimulation (touch, hump, etc) is indeed a big record. I don't remember I did that since 7 years or so. Even in my AB streak last year, I did edge everyday with my hands. now I am hands free for 78 days. WOW

It is getting easier as time goes by. I am trying to keep myself busy, also I don't feel any urge to touch myself, well to be more accurate, of course from time to time, I want to do it, or even hump the bed, but is it easier to fight back now and resist the temptation than before.

Also, I am trying to enter my third phase and try to control my thoughts and online activities. Trying to stop sexual thoughts, stop indulging in looking at girls and checking them in streets, etc. I need a relationship badly now. I need to have a whole girl in my life. I didn't have that urge before.. well I had it of course, but MB, watching girls online, etc kills that urge... now the urge is bigger. And yes, I am not ABing for a WD, I am Aing for a better me, a better life, and a new person.

My mental focus is in the sky and I am trying to leverage that.

good luck to everyone.

Hey determined11,

Great to know you have been AB'ing successfully for such a long time now..I think it's fantastic you've stuck out so long..

It's nice to read that it gets easier as time goes by...I wanna experience that feeling of easiness too..

Hmmm, controlling your thoughts and online activities is the right thing to do..I'm doing that too...

I totally understand your 'need' for a relationship...that is natural..I agree that porn, mb kills of this urge..I'm sure the increased testosterone levels u have accumulated by AB'ing will drive you to find the right girl..

All the best!

[RonaldReagan]

It's not testosterone, it's dopamine that is present in elevated concentrations in the brain when AB. But I suspect that when AB'ing, eventually the tendency to stare at girls in the real world, with no intention of approaching them (as one would do to girls in photos online) fades. There's no question that AB'ing from PMO will make you more successful in dating and relationships as you become more sociable and more extroverted.